There’s a phrase I’ve been carrying with me lately: You’re already on your way. Sometimes we just need some open space, a word, a gesture, or a reflection from the past to recognize it.

This week, I stopped by a classroom and chatted with two co-teachers. One of them shared that she felt sad she wouldn’t be working with her partner next year. Her co-teacher agreed and said, “I learned so much working with her.” I gently reminded them, “It’s all part of your journey. You were meant to work together, and now you get to spread your goodness with others.”

One of them paused and said, “I remember you wrote that in your book… every experience was an opportunity to learn and grow, and every obstacle was the path forward.”

“Wait,” I smiled, “you read my book?”
Whether it’s something I’ve written in my blog or in my book, it still catches me off guard in the best way when someone reflects it back to me. It reminded me that while I try to offer comfort and clarity to others, spaces like this offer the same in return.

That open space meant more than they knew. The comfort I offered them? It was a comfort I didn’t realize I needed. I’ll admit, there are days like this that bring on feelings of missing the camaraderie of a teaching team—the day-to-day rhythm, the unspoken understanding, the laughter that fills the in-between moments. In that space, I felt seen and heard. I was reminded that I’m already on my way too.

Recently, I had the honor of presenting an award to a student I’ve known since middle school. She’s always opened space and greeted me with the same warm energy: “How are you, Mrs. Kaufman? What book are you reading? Let me tell you about mine!” When I handed her the award, I shook her hand, looked her in the eye, and smiled.

That open space reminded me about a sentiment shared in the book my friend Meghan Lawson shared in her recent blog, The Power of Mattering by Zac Mercurio:

“Mattering is created through small, repeated interactions that ensure people feel noticed, affirmed, and needed.”

He defines the three practices of mattering as:

• Noticing – the practice of seeing and hearing others.
  
• Affirming – the practice of showing people how their unique gifts make a unique difference.
  
• Needing – the practice of showing people how they’re relied on and indispensable.
  

That space with the student? It was all three.

Jay Shetty shares a practice on Mel Robbin’s podcast that’s stayed with me: ask three people who know you well,

“When you’re struggling, what is something I help you do?”

It’s a small question that brings powerful clarity because others often see our value long before we do.

That same clarity showed up again in a reflection from my first year literacy coach. She shared that I helped her shift her lens, from seeing through the eyes of a teacher to leading through the eyes of a coach. Her words reminded me that while I was guiding her to see something new, she was helping me return to something in myself. Jay Shetty says it perfectly:

“The people who love you see what you can’t see in yourself. What you take for granted, they see as greatness.”

And then there’s Maria Shriver’s gentle reminder she shared on Jamie Kern Lima’s podcast:

“The more comfortable you get hearing your own voice, the more you trust it.”

The path forward is already within you. Trust your voice, and let the voices that lift you remind you of who you are and who you want to be.

This work, these open spaces, they help us trust our voice again. They become part of the journey home to ourselves.

In my book, The Leader Inside, I wrote:

“You don’t have to search for the big things to see good things happen. The small things matter, too.”

Sometimes those small things are found in a hallway conversation, a handshake, or a heartfelt thank you. Sometimes they’re the quiet open spaces that remind us why we lead, teach, and keep going.

So today, I offer this to you:

Keep walking.

Keep noticing.

Keep trusting your own voice. 

Keep finding open spaces. 

You’re already on your way.

And don’t forget…

The path forward? It’s already within you.

And if you’re wondering how to help others feel the same way—start here.

Three Ideas to Implement Tomorrow:

Based on Zac Mercurio’s work on mattering, especially his three core practices: Noticing, Affirming, and Needing, here are three simple, powerful things you can implement tomorrow:

1. Start the Day by Noticing

What to do:

Before or during morning interactions, intentionally notice someone’s effort, energy, or presence.

Say something like:

“I noticed how grounded you stayed during that challenging moment yesterday, it really helped your students feel safe.”

2. Affirm Someone’s Unique Strength

What to do:

Send a quick email, post-it note, or voice message to a colleague or student highlighting something specific and unique they bring.

Say something like:

“The way you make learning accessible to your students is such a gift. Your impact is infinite and makes a real difference.”

3. Let Someone Know They’re Needed

What to do:

Invite someone into a task, decision, or conversation by expressing that their input or presence matters.

Say something like:

“I’d love your voice in this conversation. Your perspective is valued and will add a lot of insight into the dialogue.”